VALENTINE GIFTS AND IDEAS FOR YOUR WOMAN

it’s Valentine’s Day and you're wondering, "Didn’t I shower her with half a paycheck's worth of gifts a month ago? Do I really have to buy her something again? Is she going to be angry if I get her an [ill-fated idea from Valentine’s Day's that are past]?" Yes, you did. Yes, you do. And, yes, she will.

With the joy of having a steady wife or girlfriend comes the responsibility of humoring her on Valentine’s Day. That means digging back into your wallet, rallying a team of our most caring brain cells and finding yet another (set of) gift(s) that shows how much you cherish her. If you fail to accept that mission, you may find yourself permanently stag by the 15th.

 I understand that really great gift ideas don’t come naturally to many guys at any time of the year, let alone so soon after the holidays. So i’ve put together a cheat sheet. No matter your girl’s personality and preferences, one of these gifts is sure to delight her. Not only will you prevent disappointing her on the most important of relationship holidays, but you may just get a very special gift in return
     Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, and the clock is ticking. What on earth are you going to get her? Get her the right gift, and she’ll know she’s the apple of your eye. Screw it up, and you’ll be spending your time together trying to prove that you’re not a total boob.

If you’re stumped, i’ve got some ideas for you. This timeless list of bound-to-please gifts will have her swooning. 

1. Diamond Ring

  

Ever since that awkward first Valentine exchange in elementary school, the heart has served as the universal symbol of Valentine’s Day, as well as love itself. . What woman won’t love a heart-shaped 10K-gold covered in diamonds? Note: If she’s waiting for the real thing, proceed with the utmost care and clarity. 

2. A New Blackberry phone/Camera

It’s not only guys who appreciate a good gadget these days. Many women admit that they prefer the geeky items over chocolate and perfumes. While Blackberry keeps their social (and cheating) appetites sated. A good Galaxy Smartphone/Camera also passes this exam.

3. Experiential Tours

Many times, the best gifts are those that involve spending time together. No matter where you live, there’s a new experience that the two of you can indulge in. View the dazzling city skyline by climbing to the tallest buildings with your picnic kit if possible, explore a local waterway by boat or have a picnic someplace unexpected.

3. A Watch

Like a fine bracelet, only more practical

4. Sex Toys

 If the idea of kinky sex raises an inquisitive eyebrow on your lady, Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to explore her (and your) desires more intimately.

5. A Bath Robe

A fine bath robe will make her feel like she just stepped out of the shower in a fancy, ₦160,000 ($1000) per-night hotel room, even if she’s rushing to get ready on a Monday morning. The robe can be customized for an extra personal touch.  

6. Her Favorite Series collection On DVD/Blu-ray

Remember how you made an excuse every single time she wanted to see a romantic comedy or drama last

year? Now is the time to make up for it by buying her the collection.

This is a cheap, pain-free gift as long as you can remember at least one of the titles that she bugged you to watch – Gossip Girl, One tree hill, SmallVille etc..(hmm...Tinsel)  Hopefully she’ll be so ecstatic that you remembered she won’t make you watch it with her.(Grinning) 

7. A Warm Cardigan 

Valentine’s Day is more than just the holiday of love and lust -- it’s February 14th, the dead of winter for the western world. (Don’t try this in tropical Africa)

8. Chocolates

Chocolate is the standard V-Day gift, and it’s easy to see why. It’s rich, creamy and muy delicioso. Not to mention it’s an aphrodisiac. There’s a reason chocolate is the candy of love. But not all chocolates are created equal. Skip the counter “pick up to complete change” variety and go for a high-end chocolate.

9. Fragrance

Perfume can be super-tricky, as every woman has a different preference when it comes to smell. Regardless, if you snag her something you think smells delicious, then she’ll likely enjoy it as well. You may have to skip the supermarket variety and look for a real Perfume store. Try Curve Appeal (if you can find it) by Elizabeth Arden. It is a heady, sexy mix of mandarin, violet, apple, nectarine, jasmine, iris, amber, sandalwood and vanilla. You’ll want to smell her all night.

10. Fancy Sheets

High-thread-count sheets are considered a luxury, not a necessity, which is exactly why they make one of the most perfect Valentine’s Day gift. Every woman wants to be pampered. They might seem a bit fancy, but once the two of you crawl underneath the covers, you’ll realize why they’re worth every penny. Plus, this is the gift that gives back; with sheets like these, she’ll never want to get out of bed. Look for Egyptian cotton in at least an 800 thread count.

11. Lingerie

speaking of gifts that give back, lingerie is another one that benefits you as much as it does her. Since you probably have no idea how bras are sized, your best bet is to sneak a peek at one of hers when she’s not looking. The tag is usually located on the back strap. If you would rather not worry about her cup size, you can get her a teddy or slip, since those come in much-easier-to-gauge sizes like small, medium and large.

 

Victoria’s Secret hasn’t been much of a secret for decades, and your girl (if classy) probably buys her bras and panties there, as well as sexier attire. Pony up a little extra cash and spice up her lingerie collection with something from abroad. Consider a curve-enhancing bustier from Italy’s La Perla or something lacy and nostalgic from London-based Agent Provocateur. Have fun picking it out -- if done correctly, it’ll be as much a gift for you as for her.

 If you want to go kitschy, Trashy Lingerie has tons of Valentine’s Day options to choose from. If you would rather go classy, Agent Provocateur never fails to impress.

12. Flowers

Flowers are a natural choice for your lady love on Valentine’s Day, and a pretty safe bet when all else fails. Unlike other gifts, flowers are appropriate, whether you’ve been dating her for one day or one year. And there are no calories involved (chocolate). Stick to the classics like roses, or, if she’s not a traditionalist, go for something exotic like lilies or orchids.    

13. At-Home Spa Goodies

Put together a spa experience by getting her everything she needs to recreate a spa at home. Engage her sense of romance with scented  candles. throw in a loofah, body lotion and bubble bath. Arrange it in a basket and, voila! You have a home spa kit.

14. A massage

The perfect end to a romantic evening? A sexy rubdown. If you find oils to be too messy use a bar, this is perfect. If your massage skills aren’t up to par, give her a real spa massage (see 13). The atmosphere will allow her to truly relax if its home

IDEAS

Let's fast-forward a few days: It's Friday morning, you're at the bar casually exchanging stories about the night before -- Valentine's Day -- with the guys. What kind of guy do you want to be? The conservative, who "surprised" his girlfriend with a box of chocolates and a fancy dinner? BORING!. Even my office morning briefing stories are more interesting than that.
This Valentine's Day, you can be the guy who stepped outside of his chocolate box, who dared to do something a bit more kinky.

Where to start? If you want to impress her, start by pleasing her with these sensual Valentine's Day ideas.

1- Prolonged foreplay

Let's jump right into it (no puns intended): When was the last time you engaged in prolonged foreplay that did not culminate with penetration? Exactly. we underestimate how important it is to warm her up, make her feel special and, ultimately, have her so turned on that she's begging for it. 

I know what you're thinking: "Seriously?" And, "Am I capable?" Yes and yes. Sometimes the anticipation is hotter than the climax. So, we recommend relishing that moment of anticipation because, hey, you'll enjoy it too. Kiss, touch, lick, tease, bite -- you choose the verb -- all night long.

Finally, if the idea of prolonged foreplay without it leading to penetration is painful, think of it this way: There's no better time than Valentine's Day to make the sacrifice -- and she'll remember it for the rest of the year. Win-win. if she doesn't ask you to penetrate her at gun point after that... *winks

2- Warm bath

Speaking of warming her up, your foreplay session could be preceded by a hot bath. This sensual Valentine's Day idea involves filling the bathtub (if you have one) with rose petals and scented oils, which will definitely help her relax and prep her body for what's about to come.

Here's the thing. Obviously you're running a hot bath for her; she knows this and so do you. If you're already making the effort, why not commit to it and go all out?

Here are some tips on how to set the mood. Play some sensual grown folks' music (Sade is foolproof -- and it's pronounced "Sha-day"), dim the lights and light the candles and make sure that you are clean (i.e. shower) before stepping in to the tub. There's nothing that kills the romance like knowing you're bathing in your own filth.      

3- Massage oils

Shop around for some massage oils that come packed with flavor. Whether you like banana, almond or chocolate, now you can rub her body down and lick off the remains.

4- New location

Sex on Valentine's Day? Wow, how original. The solution doesn't involve modifying the act; it involves modifying the location. If you're a play-it-safe kind of guy, then throwing her over the dinner table in a moment of passion will read out of character and will likely turn her on. Or try something a bit unexpected like the stairs.

For a real rush, consider public sex. The fact that it's taboo and the fear of getting caught provides an ideal outlet to release your inner kink. It's Thursday night. An evening walk in the dark sounds good. Maybe it's time to take out the trash -- you know, in that alley. Take your sex life to new heights on Valentine's Day, and she'll walk into the office/school Friday morning with a smirk of her own

5- Feed her

Maslow wasn't kidding when he said our physiological needs need to be satisfied first. So why not combine two of them for maximum pleasure? Our next sensual Valentine's Day idea involves increasing your libido with food. Cutting up fruit like strawberries, melon, apples, and chocolate can only serve to make the sexual fun even more, well, fun.

6- Blindfold her

The cliche would have you blindfold and feed her. This time, however, we recommend you blindfold her and present her with different scents, making her guess what each one is. Make one of them an actual perfume gift.

Along with the perfume, make her smell things like incense, flowers, oils, etc.

7- Tie her up

"Choke me, spank me, pull my hair." No, that's not where we're going with this entry (but if that's your thing, man, then happy Valentine's Day). Women cited domination (you dominating her) as one of their top 10 female sex fantasies. 

There's nothing quite like having a woman submit to you completely. She wants you to own your raging hormones, she wants you to savagely run your fingers through her hair and to feel the weight of your body. Begin by tying her hands to the bedpost with a scarf (a scarf she will later receive as a gift) and then have your way with her.

8- Use a feather

Going down on her is one thing; using a feather to drive her crazy and make her beg to give it a little lick is another. Use a strong feather -- or any other touch-based sex toy -- to tickle her entire body, ending at her...u know na

9- Sexy games

No, we're not talking about naked Twister. Try using body paint and playing games in which she has to guess what you're writing on her body. A wrong answer gets you five minutes of oral sex; a right answer gets her five minutes of tongue action.

10- Chocolate

What would this special day be without chocolate -- and the 101 ways that you can play with it? Try melting chocolate on each other, and pace yourself as you devour every inch of her body. If you feel like this Valentine's Day idea isn't substantial enough, combine it with another idea, like prolonged foreplay (No. 1 ). 

I dare you

This Valentine's Day, I dare you to channel your inner master , to get creative and, if nothing else, get kinky. I dare you to make her day so memorable that it will make her girlfriends' boyfriends look like amateurs. Can you handle it?

And i'll talk to you again soon
Your Friend
.....Leonhart

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VALENTINE AND ME

 

The Legend of St. Valentine

           The history of Valentine's Day and the story of its patron saint--is shrouded in mystery. We do know that February has long been celebrated as a month of romance, and that St. Valentine's Day, as we know it today, contains vestiges of both Christian and ancient Roman tradition. But who was Saint Valentine, and how did he become associated with this ancient rite?

The Catholic Church recognizes at least three different saints named Valentine or Valentinus, all of whom were martyred. One legend contends that Valentine was a priest who served during the third century in Rome. When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, he outlawed marriage for young men. Valentine, realizing the injustice of the decree, defied Claudius and continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When Valentine's actions were discovered, Claudius ordered that he be put to death.

Other stories suggest that Valentine may have been killed for attempting to help Christians escape harsh Roman prisons, where they were often beaten and tortured. According to one legend, an imprisoned Valentine actually sent the first "valentine" greeting himself after he fell in love with a young girl--possibly his jailor's daughter--who visited him during his confinement. Before his death, it is alleged that he wrote her a letter signed "From your Valentine," an expression that is still in use today.

 Although the truth behind the Valentine legends is murky, the stories all emphasize his appeal as a sympathetic, heroic and--most importantly--romantic figure. By the Middle Ages, perhaps thanks to this reputation, Valentine would become one of the most popular saints in England and France.

Origins of Valentine's Day: A Pagan Festival in February

While some believe that Valentine's Day is celebrated in the middle of February to commemorate the anniversary of Valentine's death or burial--which probably occurred around A.D. 270--others claim that the Christian church may have decided to place St. Valentine's feast day in the middle of February in an effort to "Christianize" the pagan celebration of Lupercalia. Celebrated at the ides of February, or February 15, Lupercalia was a fertility festival dedicated to Faunus, the Roman god of agriculture, as well as to the Roman founders Romulus and Remus.

To begin the festival, members of the Luperci, an order of Roman priests, would gather at a sacred cave where the infants Romulus and Remus, the founders of Rome, were believed to have been cared for by a she-wolf or lupa. The priests would sacrifice a goat, for fertility, and a dog, for purification. They would then strip the goat's hide into strips, dip them into the sacrificial blood and take to the streets, gently slapping both women and crop fields with the goat hide. Far from being fearful, Roman women welcomed the touch of the hides because it was believed to make them more fertile in the coming year. Later in the day, according to legend, all the young women in the city would place their names in a big urn. The city's bachelors would each choose a name and become paired for the year with his chosen woman. These matches often ended in marriage.

Valentine's Day: A Day of Romance

Lupercalia survived the initial rise of Christianity but was outlawed—as it was deemed “UN-Christian”--at the end of the 5th century, when Pope Gelasius declared February 14 St. Valentine's Day. It was not until much later, however, that the day became definitively associated with love. During the Middle Ages, it was commonly believed in France and England that February 14 was the beginning of birds' mating season, which added to the idea that the middle of  February (Valentine's Day) should be a day for romance.

Valentine greetings were popular as far back as the Middle Ages, though written Valentine's didn't begin to appear until after 1400. The oldest known valentine still in existence today was a poem written in 1415 by Charles, Duke of Orleans, to his wife while he was imprisoned in the Tower of London following his capture at the Battle of Agincourt. (The greeting is now part of the manuscript collection of the British Library in London, England.)

Several years later, it is believed that King Henry V hired a writer named John Lychgate to compose a valentine note to Catherine of Valois.

Typical Valentine's Day Greetings

In addition to Africa and the United States, Valentine's Day is celebrated in Canada, Mexico, the United Kingdom, France and Australia. In Great Britain, Valentine's Day began to be popularly celebrated around the 17th century. By the middle of the 18th, it was common for friends and lovers of all social classes to exchange small tokens of affection or handwritten notes, and by 1900 printed cards began to replace written letters due to improvements in printing technology. Ready-made cards were an easy way for people to express their emotions in a time when direct expression of one's feelings was discouraged. Cheaper postage rates also contributed to an increase in the popularity of sending Valentine's Day greetings.

Americans probably began exchanging hand-made valentines in the early 1700s. In the 1840s, Esther A. Howland began selling the first mass-produced valentines in America. Howland, known as the “Mother of the Valentine,” made elaborate creations with real lace, ribbons and colorful pictures known as "scrap." Today, according to the Greeting Card Association, an estimated 1 billion Valentine’s Day cards are sent each year, making Valentine's Day the second largest card-sending holiday of the year. (An estimated 2.6 billion cards are sent for Christmas.) Women purchase approximately 85 percent of all valentines.

Choice in Love

Any person has a capacity to love if he is capable of behaving at all. But there remains a question of choice upon whom a person will bestow his power to love, his power to satisfy, make happy, help the other grow, if he wants to love at all. A person may choose someone on the basis of certain estimable characteristics. He may choose someone he thinks will give him much love.

bachelors would each choose a name and become paired for the year with his chosen woman. These matches often ended in marriage.

3 Common Criteria for Loving

.

• Helplessness and need - It is easy to love another who is helpless and in need of a loving behavior without expecting anything in return. Hence it is easier to love the children who need care and protection more than the adult. When we love the children, we just give without expecting the same intensity of love we give them.
• Conformity with the Lover's Ideals - It's entirely different when we love as adults. A potential lover must have good appearance, healthy personality, and good behavior which the other must confirm before love is offered. The concept of the "ideal wife" or the "ideal husband" may be a decisive factor in determining whom to select to love. A person may pursue another who shows the beautiful and ideal characteristics as of pleasing personality, tenderness, consideration, moral uprightness, including other complex traits like good health, emotional maturity, stability, and intelligence. Some sociologists gather evidences to show that people select mates on the basis of complimentary needs, like dormant men choose passive women, some men choose less intelligent women or women from lower socioeconomic status who will make them feel superior.
• Ability of the Loved One to Reciprocate- Loving another adult is conditional. A person may not experience the desire to love another person until and unless the other person shows clear signs of a desire to love first. In other words, a person can be moved to love if, and only if, he has been first assured that he is loved. A would-be lover is afraid to take risk of being rejected, or is not willing to love, unless he sees some guarantee that his love will be returned.

The Need to Love and to be Loved

When we were born, we were helplessly in need of love from our parents in order to survive. We receive from them loving care, emotional displays of affection, and attention to our basic needs. Infants who were deprived of such, especially of a mother's personalized attention, grow in deviant ways, compared to infants who grew up in a foundling home with adequate physical care and adequate mothering.

a child who had not experienced love may grow into a psychopath who is incapable of active loving and has no conscious longings for love. If a child has had a taste of love, one that's just enough to feel it as good, he may develop what Levy called "primary effect hunger" and pursue love the rest of his life, at any cost.

The ability to love actively, is therefore an outgrowth of having one's love needs gratified earlier in life. A person whose needs are thwarted is a hungry person, seeking to be filled. When one is empty, he can hardly give. The healthy lover is one who is filled and who gives freely to his loved ones not only because of their needs but because of his abundance.

However, take note… no one is so full that he can love endlessly without receiving love in return. In mutual love, where the partners have chosen wisely, each can give freely what the other needs and each receives in return for the happiness and growth of both.

Valentine’s Day is coming up. I can smell it. I can smell the fake flowers bought hurriedly by nervous boyfriends from Shoprite; I can smell the desperation as singletons try and find someone – anyone – with whom to spend the evening; I can smell the fear. It is, in all honesty, a terrible day for everybody. Nobody wins, except perhaps Shoprite again and Deluxe Cinema’s. People who aren’t in a relationship get an entire 24 hours devoted to rubbing their noses in this tragic fact, and the people who are get to receive flowers they have no room for, chocolates they don’t even like, and teddy bears they haven’t appreciated since they were about 14 (none of which were what they hoped for, because,believe me boys, when a girl says ‘no, let’s not do presents this year’ she really, REALLY doesn’t mean it).

Unfortunately the presents, bought to spell out ‘I love you’, very rarely manage to convey such a complex emotion – in fact, they generally mean something else entirely. Flowers translate as ‘I completely forgot it was Valentine’s Day so I stole these out of an old lady’s garden when I was on the way to meet you’; chocolates translate as ‘I literally had no idea what to get you, so I bought you these’ and teddy bears translate as ‘I’m totally skint (broke) so here’s an ‘I love you’ teddy you can name after me ….(just as you named the last after your ex and the one before too…etc)’. Now, should I receive any gifts this Valentine’s Day – hoards of admirers take note – I should want something personal, something that says ‘I do actually know who you are and what you like’. A carton of Le’ roux or Andre, red wine or a keg of palm wine would be nice, for example. I do like my wine.

But this is exactly Valentine’s Day’s problem, if it were attending a self-help group along with a bunch of other seriously disturbed public holidays (May Day, for example – I mean, what on earth is that celebrating? What’s so good about May?) In such circumstances, Valentine’s Day would be forced to own up to the fact that it no longer has much to do with love, and that it was invented by the greetings card companies who saw a whole four months between New Year and Easter during which they had no way of squeezing money out of the innocent British public in exchange for pieces of shiny cardboard.

 Okay, I lie. That isn’t exactly how Valentine’s Day originated – it has a much nicer story than that (above). But the day has certainly been corrupted. These days it’s about proving yourself and your relationship to everybody else; it’s about not being the only one in your group of friends that has to spend the day alone; it’s about buying the biggest and most useless gift for your loved one, when really it should be about appreciating and celebrating your relationship. Although this in itself sounds a bit odd – why should we need Clinton Cards to tell our partners we love them? Surely we should be doing it every day already?

But I guess the point is that we aren’t. Much as I would love everybody to live in my world, in which cannabis and booze are good for you and people say ‘I love you’ all the time, reality just isn’t like that. Valentine’s Day has been turned into a business, losing much of its charm in the process, but in essence, I suppose, it might still be necessary. (Though for the record it is never necessary to buy a card so big it doesn’t fit through the letterbox – this does not prove your love, only that you don’t think ahead and like to embarrass your love by making him or her go down to the post office to collect it.)

The reason Valentine’s Day is such a failure, then, is because we forget its simple message, hype it up and inevitably get disappointed. Single people expect to be whisked off their feet (unlikely), people in relationships expect to be whisked off their feet (even more unlikely), and everybody forgets what it really means: constant, steady, reliable, lovely love. Not just romantic love, but every single silly type of love this world plays host to. The love we have for our parents, our siblings, our friends, our pets – all are equally important and equally undervalued in our busy, stressful lives and are the ones (not just a lover) who deserve appreciation on Valentine’s day, and Every day of our lives while they are still alive and with us.( I love you Dad)

I started off this article with its history and ended it wanting to expose Valentine’s Day, but I don’t think it needs exposing – I think we all know how silly it is. The real point is that even though we know this, we still partake in it. None of us, me included, are willing to get rid of it because we all hope that one day we will be whisked away to New York in a heart shaped plane to be wined and dined and taken shopping.

 
This is a nice dream, but save it for when you’re sleeping. and ask yourself: who do you love? And then tell them. Tell every last one of them because I can guarantee you do not tell them enough, and nothing says ‘I love you’ better than that. Except perhaps heart shaped planes, but I wouldn’t hold my breath. I doubt they’re the right shape for air travel.

I'll talk to you again soon 

Your Friend 

.....Leonhart

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